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How to make friends in the Philippines

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expat.com

We have been talking about loneliness when you are abroad, let's now talk about how to make friends (locals and other expats) when you're living in the Philippines :top:

Which are your best tips to meet people and to make friends in the Philippines??

Thanks in advance for your participation

DavaoBruce

To make friends with other expats:
Look for Expat groups
Strike up conversations at malls
Start connections online

To make friends with Filipinos:

Be nice and social but do not make close friendships until you understand cultural differences.

laagan

be nice and be natural. filipinos are by nature very hospitable so if you talk to us, we will entertain you.
respect begets respect

xpatinphils

Be as hospitable and friendly as the people in the host culture.

odydelamerced

As in any country, making friends in the Philippines is the best way to get settled down.  Social support is a must.

The trick is to develop the skill to know who to befriend.  Again as in any other country, there are those who are genuinely interested in making friends with expats and there are those who expats have to stay away from ... including, but not limited to, the con artists.

Maybe to many, natural instincts kick in when circumstances present themselves and then they decide whether or not the person in front of him could be a great friend.

I suggest you start looking where people of integrity are nomally found: professional organizations like the local chamber of commerce or civic oriented groups.

Philippines is a predominantly Catholic country. So a local Catholic church organization would be a good start to look for a friend. You can then expand your circle of friends henceforth. :)

xpatinphils

Friendships start out as acquaintances and can't be forced, no matter what culture you're living in. They have to develop develop naturally on their own. So maybe the question should be rephrased as to where you can make acquaintances that might turn into friendships. As some of the above posts state,  attend professional or social organizations, such as those centered on your favorite hobby or intrerest, and be careful when you meet people about getting too close too soon.

DavaoBruce

First there are different types of friends to make when being an Expat.
A you encounter Expats, I like to see if they are willing to make eye contact. If they do, I usually say hi and see if they are interested in talking.
There are many foreigners here that were totally unsociable in their home country and do not know how to be sociable here. They think they are so lucky to get young women without realizing it is their money.
If you do talk with a foreigner, start on basics and see where it leads. The only thing you might have in common is your a foreigner and have nothing else in common.
With Filipinos, be friendly when you encounter them. At first they will be nice, but will not invite you to their home or offer a social situation. Over time, if you continue to meet them, a friendship might grow.
Most filipino friends I met we from the time I was working.
Remember, most look at you as someone different with more money and not much else in common.
Plus, I find the friendliest filipinos are the poorer class and their english is not as good and they feel ashamed for you to see how they live.
I am lucky to made some good friends with poorer working class people and have been godfather at 2 weddings and one baptism already.

benmag

I totally agree with what ody shared.  The best way to  make real friends in the Philippines is to join professional organizations and civic oriented groups.  Joining a sport club would also be a good way to meet cool people too.

ronnieguarin

The Filipinos vary in their treating with foreigners depending on the status in life.  As what was mentioned above, poorer Filipinos are more receptive to Foreigners.  They are very hospitable.  They generally treat them as customers so that they can recognize that Filipinos have pure heart regardless of economic status.

Tropicalpenpals

Generally there are foreigners everywhere many are just here a few weeks waiting for papers to be processed for their partners visas etc. Others are here long-term. Socially there are places different types of Expats hangout for example in Cebu there are certain drinking bar/restos that are frequented by Expats so meeting them isnt an issue although sorting the good from the bad may take some time.

Filipinos like the Foreigners have a mixed bag of people there are a lot of foreigners here as well as Filipinos riding on the backs of fresh green arrivals. The Realtor market is a prime example with its over pricing and a lot of the time prices go up just because your a foreigner. Doesn't make a difference if your friends or not as I found out myself when some of my Filipino friends added an extra P500,000 to a property they were selling as a realtor (they are supposed to just take their 5% commission not steal the extra P500k!) Didnt buy the house and I have distanced myself from anyone who tries to sell me something. In defence of Filipinos though I know a British Expat who was very forceful on his sale technique of Legacy policies which you probably seen in the news before. After the collapse became the injured animal and forgets to mention the fact he had caused a lot of people to go bankrupt. Best people I met here are Expats who are at the same level and generally just socialise (We dont interfere in each others business) and Filipinos of what they think is a lower social standing yet there is no social barrier as far as im concerned. I quit the West because of Ego's and status driven consumerism so I not inviting it in here.. anyone like that can keep it..lol

jake

I have lived here for over 18 months and have loads of friends and been in all of their homes. I love it and I wish I came here long ago. I have recently had some so called recent friends who after a while when my Asawa said to stop giving NON repayable loans as they were using cash to get drunk and not using the cash to what they told me like childrens medicine and bills. I immediately became #1 jerk and was actually told to take the Philippine flag off our home and told I was not welcome here. Since then we have been harassed by groups spitting and abusive language and a couple of true death threats that are registered at PNP but nothing done. I was warned about this area and took no heed as I seen the house liked it and bought it. Now I wish I had listened to the real friends. Anyone else been in something like this mess here in Samar or other locations?

bri&ivy

im new ere also, (2 years in & out ) i was only asked once for a loan (10,000) lol,,  but i was realy took aback ? a local store owner where i bought my day to day things and my couple of bottles of smb, he just assumed im white, so must be rich lol,,   no where near rich, back to your post !  i think my first visit ere was just like what your saying, i was generous and gave loans to people i thought was friends ! now i never do give them ! the same people never speak to me now lol,, i wonder why,,,

donovan

Hi, we have moved to Cebu, one month ago from Australia, we have two girls aged 1 and 3. We would love to meet other expats for coffee and playdates, someone mentioned it's easy to meet people because you go to the expat bars, restaurants, we haven't met many.... We met one family but the mother works during the day...

Where are these places in Cebu to meet, what restaurants etc

if anyone knows anywhere or anyone who wants a playdate, please feel free to email me,

FeeAcer

Hi and welcome to ½ûÂþÌìÌÃ, Donovan :)

ewong

it is really very easy to make friends in my country. one of the easiest way is to put a chair outside you house take off your shirt put it on you shoulder buy a bottle of Gin (ginebra san miguel)for only 50 pesos(1$) after three or four days you will have a lot of friends some are true and some are only for the Gin. but its easy to sort it out. ^_^

emarinuk

LOL and 100% agree with ewong!

bartok

ewong wrote:

it is really very easy to make friends in my country. one of the easiest way is to put a chair outside you house take off your shirt put it on you shoulder buy a bottle of Gin (ginebra san miguel)for only 50 pesos(1$) after three or four days you will have a lot of friends some are true and some are only for the Gin. but its easy to sort it out. ^_^


hahaha, nice one. But is it really necessary to take off the shirt?hehehehe

Digos City

Im American and moving there, im getting married there to my filipena wife forever. I have many friends there and here in America. I have been there already for two weeks to see wife. Most of my friends are filipena. Americans are so much loved in the Philippeans.

riameme

Filipinos are very hospitable and friendly. You can join some organizations to gain more friends.

Cyrill

Filipinos are known for their hospitality, in line with that is its very accommodating and approachable trait. Filipinos are easy to get along and fun to be with.

TeacherSumi

DavaoBruce wrote:

First there are different types of friends to make when being an Expat.
A you encounter Expats, I like to see if they are willing to make eye contact. If they do, I usually say hi and see if they are interested in talking.
There are many foreigners here that were totally unsociable in their home country and do not know how to be sociable here. They think they are so lucky to get young women without realizing it is their money.
If you do talk with a foreigner, start on basics and see where it leads. The only thing you might have in common is your a foreigner and have nothing else in common.
With Filipinos, be friendly when you encounter them. At first they will be nice, but will not invite you to their home or offer a social situation. Over time, if you continue to meet them, a friendship might grow.
Most filipino friends I met we from the time I was working.
Remember, most look at you as someone different with more money and not much else in common.
Plus, I find the friendliest filipinos are the poorer class and their english is not as good and they feel ashamed for you to see how they live.
I am lucky to made some good friends with poorer working class people and have been godfather at 2 weddings and one baptism already.


I agree with DavaoBruce. If you are an expat working in a company it will be easy for you to make friends with local people.
It's good that you have observed that you could find some good friends from lower-class Filipino citizens. But it doesn't mean that you can't find nice people with higher-class of living. The difference is that, when you live in an exclusive village, where from morning till evening  you can just count the people walking in the street, neighborhood don't usually talk to one another,like with a super-private life and when you  belong to a residential area where people always chat about their neighbors lives (middle class-low class people), they are the types who are more likely concern on what's happening to you,at first for sure they will be shy to approach you but as time passes by they will learn / try to talk to you and to know some details about your personal/love life..and later on they will invite you to some "inuman" / drinking session...hehehehehe...

dame de trésor

DavaoBruce wrote:

To make friends with other expats:
Look for Expat groups
Strike up conversations at malls
Start connections online


To make friends with Filipinos:

Be nice and social but do not make close friendships until you understand cultural differences.


so true! do not  make close friendships because they  might take you for granted , vice versa :)

expats:
1. Look   for the expat's hangout.
2. Do not hesitate to ask foreign guys. Because like you, they also  like to meet new interesting people.
3. Go and get  weekend escapades and visit  out of town beaches and scuba sites, because foreign guys are so into sunny weather.
4. It's better to be approachable than  being a snob. Leaen  how to smile :) it's free right?
5. Be real! best way to win  real friends is to make them feel you're not fake.

dame de trésor

TeacherSumi wrote:
DavaoBruce wrote:

First there are different types of friends to make when being an Expat.
A you encounter Expats, I like to see if they are willing to make eye contact. If they do, I usually say hi and see if they are interested in talking.
There are many foreigners here that were totally unsociable in their home country and do not know how to be sociable here. They think they are so lucky to get young women without realizing it is their money.
If you do talk with a foreigner, start on basics and see where it leads. The only thing you might have in common is your a foreigner and have nothing else in common.
With Filipinos, be friendly when you encounter them. At first they will be nice, but will not invite you to their home or offer a social situation. Over time, if you continue to meet them, a friendship might grow.
Most filipino friends I met we from the time I was working.
Remember, most look at you as someone different with more money and not much else in common.
Plus, I find the friendliest filipinos are the poorer class and their english is not as good and they feel ashamed for you to see how they live.
I am lucky to made some good friends with poorer working class people and have been godfather at 2 weddings and one baptism already.


I agree with DavaoBruce. If you are an expat working in a company it will be easy for you to make friends with local people.
It's good that you have observed that you could find some good friends from lower-class Filipino citizens. But it doesn't mean that you can't find nice people with higher-class of living. The difference is that, when you live in an exclusive village, where from morning till evening  you can just count the people walking in the street, neighborhood don't usually talk to one another,like with a super-private life and when you  belong to a residential area where people always chat about their neighbors lives (middle class-low class people), they are the types who are more likely concern on what's happening to you,at first for sure they will be shy to approach you but as time passes by they will learn / try to talk to you and to know some details about your personal/love life..and later on they will invite you to some "inuman" / drinking session...hehehehehe...


I disagree with you about the people who live in an exclusive  villages. They do care! they are just quiet but observant, don't walk and standby on the street but they now what is happening around the village, They seem snob but actually they just want to mind their own business and do not like gossip.

"Some" people in slums, middle or low are likely concern but make sure not to show them how generous you are coz they are prone to use other people. They so like to talk to you about life which is good because it makes you feel  " i belong"  , but makes sure you'll not give the trust 100% save some  in your pocket. Why? because they like gossip.(sorry to say ). Make sure you can manage to join them when they invite you and offer you a shot of local gin, rum, lambanog ( they use 1 glass for all).


I am filipina but I am not bias. I do not want to mislead other people just to lift my self because I also don't want them to mislead me when I visit their place. Law of karma works really good for me.

For foreign guys: Try to learn some basic Tagalog language, specially bad words.

For Filipino guys: It's so rude to speak tagalog in front of foreign guys. Put your self on their shoes smile

PEACE WORLD!

Tropicalpenpals

donovan wrote:

Hi, we have moved to Cebu, one month ago from Australia, we have two girls aged 1 and 3. We would love to meet other expats for coffee and playdates, someone mentioned it's easy to meet people because you go to the expat bars, restaurants, we haven't met many.... We met one family but the mother works during the day...

Where are these places in Cebu to meet, what restaurants etc

if anyone knows anywhere or anyone who wants a playdate, please feel free to email me,


Hi Donovan,

           to be honest most expats don't orientate round family life which has been an issue for us as well. We have 2 kids and generally our friends are Pinoy when it comes to family as San Mig seems to orientate round most of the Expat community. I have been here 3 years and haven't really come across a family orientated group although  would love to be part of one especially with young kids to help with language and communication skills. Where are you based? We live south of cebu city.

Tropicalpenpals

jake wrote:

I have lived here for over 18 months and have loads of friends and been in all of their homes. I love it and I wish I came here long ago. I have recently had some so called recent friends who after a while when my Asawa said to stop giving NON repayable loans as they were using cash to get drunk and not using the cash to what they told me like childrens medicine and bills. I immediately became #1 jerk and was actually told to take the Philippine flag off our home and told I was not welcome here. Since then we have been harassed by groups spitting and abusive language and a couple of true death threats that are registered at PNP but nothing done. I was warned about this area and took no heed as I seen the house liked it and bought it. Now I wish I had listened to the real friends. Anyone else been in something like this mess here in Samar or other locations?


Common story and one I know of several stuck in the same situation the main issue can't sell the house to move. Your first problem was giving money to other people, I had a beggar at my store yesterday expecting a handout and I directed them to the Barangay Captain for assistance as I am not a local and poverty is nothing to do with me. You have started a ball rolling you will struggle to stop and most Expats who do this sort of stuff generally don't admit it. Although they normally give cash away to freeloading relatives used to riding on the backs of OFWs. This is caused by relatives such as aunts getting the kids through education and then expecting a lifelong debt the kids can never repay. Even experienced this myself and calculated what my wife would have cost in education and gave it to the aunt saying X = Y and you've come out ahead already so as far as we are concerned debt paid.

TeacherSumi

dame de trésor wrote:
TeacherSumi wrote:
DavaoBruce wrote:

First there are different types of friends to make when being an Expat.
A you encounter Expats, I like to see if they are willing to make eye contact. If they do, I usually say hi and see if they are interested in talking.
There are many foreigners here that were totally unsociable in their home country and do not know how to be sociable here. They think they are so lucky to get young women without realizing it is their money.
If you do talk with a foreigner, start on basics and see where it leads. The only thing you might have in common is your a foreigner and have nothing else in common.
With Filipinos, be friendly when you encounter them. At first they will be nice, but will not invite you to their home or offer a social situation. Over time, if you continue to meet them, a friendship might grow.
Most filipino friends I met we from the time I was working.
Remember, most look at you as someone different with more money and not much else in common.
Plus, I find the friendliest filipinos are the poorer class and their english is not as good and they feel ashamed for you to see how they live.
I am lucky to made some good friends with poorer working class people and have been godfather at 2 weddings and one baptism already.


I agree with DavaoBruce. If you are an expat working in a company it will be easy for you to make friends with local people.
It's good that you have observed that you could find some good friends from lower-class Filipino citizens. But it doesn't mean that you can't find nice people with higher-class of living. The difference is that, when you live in an exclusive village, where from morning till evening  you can just count the people walking in the street, neighborhood don't usually talk to one another,like with a super-private life and when you  belong to a residential area where people always chat about their neighbors lives (middle class-low class people), they are the types who are more likely concern on what's happening to you,at first for sure they will be shy to approach you but as time passes by they will learn / try to talk to you and to know some details about your personal/love life..and later on they will invite you to some "inuman" / drinking session...hehehehehe...


I disagree with you about the people who live in an exclusive  villages. They do care! they are just quiet but observant, don't walk and standby on the street but they now what is happening around the village, They seem snob but actually they just want to mind their own business and do not like gossip.

"Some" people in slums, middle or low are likely concern but make sure not to show them how generous you are coz they are prone to use other people. They so like to talk to you about life which is good because it makes you feel  " i belong"  , but makes sure you'll not give the trust 100% save some  in your pocket. Why? because they like gossip.(sorry to say ). Make sure you can manage to join them when they invite you and offer you a shot of local gin, rum, lambanog ( they use 1 glass for all).


I am filipina but I am not bias. I do not want to mislead other people just to lift my self because I also don't want them to mislead me when I visit their place. Law of karma works really good for me.

For foreign guys: Try to learn some basic Tagalog language, specially bad words.

For Filipino guys: It's so rude to speak tagalog in front of foreign guys. Put your self on their shoes smile

PEACE WORLD!


oh thank you for that ^_^;
those are just my observations .

umr

Friends are the most valuable possessions man gets in life.

umr

thats good.. friend is someone u can share everything with

umr

I want someone to be friend of mine..

´¡³Ü°ùé±ô¾±±ð

Hello umr -> I guess an introduction might help. ;)

Thank you,
´¡³Ü°ùé±ô¾±±ð

jazzi Rion

by giving my Facebook name and by emails

jazzi Rion

½ûÂþÌìÌà wrote:

We have been talking about loneliness when you are abroad, let's now talk about how to make friends (locals and other expats) when you're living in the Philippines :top:

Which are your best tips to meet people and to make friends in the Philippines??

Thanks in advance for your participation

James Mitchel

It takes a little time. Get to know your neighbors. Say hi wave when you see them, speak to them.  Be a nice person.  Get out and walk around, do business some with the small stores on the street were you live so they know you. Meet expats so speak to the ones you see at the malls and stores. Many have been here for years and can tell you were they meet.  Just get out and be friendly. In a few months you know people here.  And were things are at as well.  Save a lot of money knowing the area and town you live in if you know were things are. Take the jeepny some times as well. So you know the routs. Big thing is just get out and meet people. And know the neighbors as well.

donna29

First,u have to make an effort in adjusting and adopting the place in which you are working.Im still struggling to handle my situation being far to my two daughters and parents.Its really hard because i miss them so much but still i have to pursue my job for me to support them financialy Anyway,Im nothing to worry because God is with me all the time.I strongly trust and believe in Him.

lsn73

Hi everyone,
I truly believe that Filipinos are mostly friendly and I do hope to get to know some locals there as I have plans to start a business in Manila.
Any help in setting up my business will be greatly appreciated.

Cheers,
Sunny

Christine

Hello everyone,

Just to remind you that the topic of this thread is "How to make friends in the Philippines".

Thank you.

thuautif

DavaoBruce wrote:

To make friends with other expats:
Look for Expat groups
Strike up conversations at malls
Start connections online

To make friends with Filipinos:

Be nice and social but do not make close friendships until you understand cultural differences.


Totally agree

James Mitchel

I had no problem here.  Take the trikes, talk to people, be yourself, Join when ask, And the next thing you know you have friends here.

Cynthiavilla

Just smile and be natural but also be careful!

Cynthiavilla

Looking for expat in Tagaytay to meet up and simply have good conversations on variety of topic! I am a Fil-Canadian will be in tagaytay from today until the 14th; Also on the 19th I will be in Cebu

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